Dame Kelly Holmes: Unapologetically Driven
The second part of our event Building Minds: Empowerment of Women in Architecture and Construction began when double-gold Olympian, Dame Kelly Holmes joined host Conleth Buckley on stage for a live interview.
Skipping the small talk, Conleth offered his congratulations to Kelly on recently coming out as gay. This set the tone for a candid and moving interview in which Kelly reflected upon her intersectional identity and her journey of actualisation and empowerment.
“It sounds weird, doesn’t it? Congratulating someone for being themselves.” Kelly mused, explaining that when she first realised she was gay, she was in the British Army. At that time, being openly gay in the military had severe consequences, including imprisonment. She shared how she had witnessed fellow soldiers, some of whom had been on frontlines, stripped of military honours and discharged simply for being themselves.
“Imagine being vilified in your own quarters, your belongings rooted through and strewn about, just because of who you love,” In those days, even the suspicion of homosexuality could trigger aggressive, punitive inspections. It was a stark reminder of how different things were for gay people not so long ago and provoked the thought that liberation is tenuous and requires defending.
“I lived with fear all my life until I decided I wanted to live, truly live, and that meant coming out and being me,” she declared, “and now I don’t care what anyone thinks” which got a roar of approbation.
Kelly spoke movingly about her experience of burnout, of her mental health struggles, compounded by the demands of an athletic career in which she redefined her sport and became the first British woman to win two gold medals at the same Olympics. Conleth suggested that her highs were as extreme as her lows, to which Kelly agreed, emphasising that she had always found ample support from her team and family
Kelly drew parallels between her military and sporting experiences and broader issues like gender equality in professional fields. Her athletic and military careers exemplify the perseverance and resilience she displays in all aspects of her life.
“I like being driven, because if I drive, I learn something.” Kelly described herself as ‘unapologetically driven,’ a phrase she attributed to Suzy Eddie Izzard. She had this message for people who might feel the same, “What you’re saying is real — life’s too short to keep putting yourself second. You’re driven, and that’s not a flaw; it’s part of who you are. You don’t want to stop because doing, learning, and growing gives you purpose — and if you can pass that on, even better. People say ‘find balance’ but for someone like you, balance might just mean making sure what you’re doing fuels you, not just everyone else. You care deeply, and that’s a strength — just don’t forget to care for yourself too.”
With an audience of architects, contractors, and designers, Conleth asked Kelly to share a story demonstrating her building project management skills. Growing up in Hildenborough, Kent, Kelly had frequented a traditional sweetshop which had ceased trading by the time she became an adult. She was determined to resurrect the shop as it had been a pivotal community space.
Kelly recounted how she had become personally involved in the architectural and structural planning, noting that she had intervened when others on site overlooked critical details. “I noticed technical and structural changes that had been overlooked. I ended up project managing significant parts of the build,” she explained, highlighting her handson approach and meticulous oversight, which were crucial to the project's success. There was much nodding at this!
“I like being driven, because if I drive, I learn something.”
The interview concluded with Kelly addressing the future, urging the audience to think ambitiously. She spoke of the need for systemic change to support not only women but all marginalised groups within professional sectors. “We need to change the narrative, challenge the status quo, and ensure everyone, regardless of their background or identity, has a fair chance to succeed.”
The talk was inspiring, leaving everyone not just moved by Kelly’s unapologetic drive but motivated to push for a more equitable professional world, especially in industries like architecture and construction where there are many systemic inequalities. Her story of overcoming adversity also emphasised the need to pave the way for others, a fitting message for an event dedicated to empowering women within the industry
